Devious, Devious Christians!

Heh heh heh…this is just TOO GOOD not to share!  While creating my “following” list yesterday, I read the latest post over at Matt Walsh’s blog entitled, Why do you Christians always throw the Bible in my face?


Seriously, it hurts. Stop it, will ya? Yesterday I walked by a church and the pastor barreled out of the door, ran into the street, screamed “BIBLE!” and chucked it right at my head.

Well, that didn’t LITERALLY happen. But he did say, “good afternoon, God bless,” which is basically the same thing.

In any case, Christians are always shoving their religion in people’s faces. Everything they say, every position they hold, every thought they express — it’s all RELIGION. Even if they don’t explicitly say, “I think this because of my religion,” we all know the score. If it comes from RELIGION, as a secularist, I must hate it. If it’s been heavily influenced or transformed by RELIGION or RELIGIOUS people, I must hate it. That’s why I’m not a big fan of art, architecture, democracy, science, medicine, philosophy, astronomy, the university system, the abolition of slavery, America, Natural Law, Natural Rights, mathematics, the justice system, literature, music, and civilization.

Devious. Devious Christians. It’s like they have this secret plot and they use all of these methods to subversively give glory to their fake sky wizard. That’s a good line, isn’t it? I take this idea of God; the uncaused cause, the first mover, the Creator, the Absolute, the Answer to the riddle that no quantum physicist has ever been able to solve, and I equate it to a “wizard.” As if belief in dimensions of existence that transcend our physical plane can somehow be fairly compared to belief in magical Disney creatures. It’s an effective tactic, isn’t it? Aquinas, DaVinci, Shakespeare, Washington — most of the intellectual giants and great leaders in the past two thousand years have been guided by this conviction, but I can utterly dismiss it with one sarcastic and belittling phrase. There are thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of pages of Christian apologetics written by some of the smartest men and women to ever walk the face of the Earth, yet I can chalk it all up to something as absurd as the Tooth Fairy. And you know what? I can do that without even reading ANY of those pages! You know why? Because I’m a critical thinker, my friend.

A critical thinker — I think about criticizing things. And then I do, without understanding the depth, enormity and beauty of that which I mock.

Oh my!!! Before you respond in comments, be sure to read the entire post!

With 500 comments over there, I thought I’d share the ones that I wrote over at Matt’s blog here at my own blog,  as well as one special response to a typical “I hate Christians” rant that caught my eye.

christinewjc says:

November 12, 2013 at 12:08 am

Oh Matt…if I didn’t know any better, I’d say that you have recently been encouraged, revitalized, and spiritually uplifted by Billy Graham’s My Hope America: The Cross special that aired on several TV stations last week! That special certainly brought tears to my eyes. It represented 95-year-old Billy Graham’s final attempt to reach the lost for salvation through Jesus Christ. It was wonderfully done! And I hope it will become a new spiritual awakening here in America! For those who missed it, watch it here:

You can also visit my blog:

Warning! I’m just another one of those Bible thumpers who loves Jesus Christ!

Well, as predictable as another Obama lie, along comes a commenter who writes in response:

IcedTea157 says:

November 12, 2013 at 11:59 am

Nice try, Billy Graham……


christinewjc says:

November 12, 2013 at 12:56 pm


Before I respond to why I think you wrote the “nice try” comment about Billy Graham, perhaps you’d like to expand upon the reason?

Well, further down in the comment section, “IcedTea157” wrote a rant (which most likely could have been aimed at any Christian believer):

IcedTea157 says:

November 12, 2013 at 12:14 pm

“When the religious try and use “God did it” as their explanation for things they don’t understand, Neil DeGrasse Tyson said it best: “If that’s how you want to invoke your evidence for God, then God is an ever-receding pocket of scientific ignorance that’s getting smaller and smaller and smaller as time moves on.”

Except that that isnt how I want to invoke my God… I have no qualms with scientific discoveries shedding light on the dark areas of out knowledge. The pope himself (JPII) said that “Evolution is more than a theory” and the Vatican has its own observatory. Biblical literalism is a largely new, largely protestant phenomenon, and, frankly, it’s stupid.

“I’ve been ostracized and ridiculed because of my non-belief, even though I’m not the one who’s touting the all-loving, all-knowing, never-been-seen penultimate creator who is so omniscient he needed to wipe out all life on the planet as some sort of great cosmic mulligan.”

QQ moar. Please. As if I haven’t been ostracized for “believing in the magical sky fairy.” You are not special for having been made fun of, and you are not alone. It happens to all of us, because human beings are asshats who feel this deep-seated need to convince everyone around them to adopt their theory of reality.

“The religious folks of the world are allowed to pray with impunity. They can say grace, they can say they’ll pray for you, they can even say things as ludicrous as “God told me…”, and nobody bats an eye”

Lol. Not true at all.

“…but let someone point out the glaringly obvious, that no god, of the thousands that have been invented by man, has ever offered a single iota of proof as to his, her or it’s existence…and they’re suddenly burned at the stake, offered up as a sacrifice, exiled, marginalized, or shunned.”

Also not true at all.

“There’s one challenge that believers have never been able to answer. If gods can heal people’s cancer, or make paraplegics walk again, if they can cause prophetic visions and summon earthquakes…why have none of them ever healed an amputee?”

“If God is all-powerful, then why hasnt he ever done [xyz]?” I don’t know, I’m not God, and we don’t think like God. It says in the bible: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.” Isaiah 55:8. We aren’t god and god isn’t us and so he doesn’t do everything that we would expect him to do. Because our priorities are not necessarily his priorities.

At the end of the day, though, I don’t really care if you believe in the same God I do or not. I have many, many atheist friends, and many Christian, Jewish, Muslim, and Buddhist, friends as well. It doesn’t matter to me. But please, don’t get offended when I say “God Bless You” or if I pray for someone or give money to my church. Why does it matter what I do? How does it affect you so much? Why do you care?

Melissa responds all so eloquently!!!

Melissa says:

November 12, 2013 at 12:24 pm

So your saying if an amputee got healed, you would believe in God?
Ok, well then believe. It is called a prosthesis. I bet your thinking, “Science did that, I’m right!”. Try to imagine for one moment this concept: IF God is alive, would he not be the MASTER of all science, all philosophy, all astronomy, physics, and any and all knowledge in general? Would he not have a PERFECT (complete, absolute) understanding of ALL stuff that you pointed out is evidence that God does NOT exist? Could God not then use that knowledge to do whatever he wants? Could he not create this Earth, start human life , start plant life, create other worlds, or do anything else by the use of his superior use of science? Could he not lead man along with knowledge through the ages, and have as culminating discovery the power to fix a missing limb? I don’t care if you believe it, it is a logical argument.
If there is no God, I am only bound by the power of men on Earth. I could kill, murder, rape, abuse, neglect children, do anything I want. The only reason it isn’t ‘allowed’ is because the majority of people think it is wrong. SO WHAT! So if the majority of people say it is ok to murder, I can murder? Moral truths are handed down from God and are non-negotiable. We do not have the right to declare moral what God has declared immoral.
If you are right about God, then when this life is over, you can tell me you were wrong ALL you want. You can laugh at me, do whatever. Oh wait… we won’t exist. I can guarantee you I will not be sad that I didn’t use life as an opportunity to lie, cheat, steal, or murder.
If I am right, I will mourn for you that you had to live your life without the knowledge that Jesus loves you unconditionally and has laid a path for you to be eternally happy. You can still change, but it is unfortunate you didn’t change now.

My comment:

christinewjc says:

November 12, 2013 at 1:17 pm

Wow Melissa! What a wonderful response to IcedTea157!

I have been debating with a nemesis like that for over 9 years at my blog (former blog). It is sad that people like that rail against God when Jesus Christ was sent to ask us (and subsequently answer) the most important question: Who do you say that I am? With repentance and faith at the foot of Christ’s cross for the sins of mankind, we are reconciled back unto God. The Bible says, “without faith, it is impossible to please God.” Non-believers want proof on their terms – not through the wisdom and knowledge that is told and taught to us through God’s Word, the Bible and that was physically revealed to us through the ministry of Jesus Christ..

Well, you obviously know all of this already based on your response to IcedTea157. Good work! All we can do is pray that he/she will take what you wrote to heart and someday see the Truth that Christ has revealed! God bless!

Hat tip: Matt Walsh blog + commenters quoted.

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5 Responses to “Devious, Devious Christians!”

  1. annetbell Says:

    Thought you might like this post!


  2. christinewjc Says:

    Thanks annetbell! I will take a look at the site!


  3. christinewjc Says:

    Well, Matt’s post at his blog is certainly stirring up quite the conversation! There are some Christians commenting there who are horrified by what Matt wrote! They hate the title – too. Can’t blame them – Matt’s parody certainly points out the usual negative drivel that atheists/skeptics/God and Bible haters spew our way. However, it is important to know who the author is (admitted Christian) and why he wrote what he did in the way he wrote it!

    An additional comment I made there:

    christinewjc says:

    November 13, 2013 at 11:52 am


    Another definition of satire:
    Cultural Dictionary
    satire definition
    A work of literature that mocks social conventions, another work of art, or anything its author thinks ridiculous.

    I think that this blog post could also be considered parody:

    Parody is a specific form of comedy, used to satirize, mock or poke fun at a particular piece of work. It emphasizes imitation, emulating the characteristics of the chosen target to humorous or exaggerated effect. Some experts consider it a low form of comedy–the perception is that it can be undertaken too easily–but it has produced more than its share of genuine creative masterpieces. It is often used as an element in more pointed satire, but satire needn’t include parody in order to be effective.

    Parody depends upon imitation: the ability to evoke the object being parodied closely enough to induce recognition, but with enough leeway to broaden or deflate its characteristics.

    Beyond that, parody requires an ability to recognize the tired, cliched or pompous aspects of a target, and to point out such foibles via the same methods and techniques that were used to create them in the first place. [I believe that these last two sentences best describe Matt’s intent within his writing. IMHO, he has achieved this in a masterfully significant way!]

    Read more:

    I will just add that Matt probably wasn’t doing this to ridicule people who don’t believe in Christ, but to ridicule the peculiarity, weakness, and failing arguments that they espouse.

    P.S. Matt – if I got this wrong please correct.


  4. Cry and Howl Says:

    Hey Christine!
    The guy is typical of those who can’t grasp the idea that something or someone is actually smarter than they. His lengthy literary blather fits perfectly with a fool’s voice … which is known through the multitude of words.


  5. christinewjc Says:

    In typical form, the “IcedTea” guy never returned to reply to my comment over at Matt’s blog! His know-it-all attitude and rejection of God’s Word is exactly what you wrote: “literary blather fits perfectly with a fool’s voice.” A verse from Romans comes to mind:

    Rom 1:22

    Professing to be wise, they became fools,

    How could anyone think themselves wiser that the Creator of the universe? It’s just so stupid…


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